Days 26-2 [April]: Mental & Physical Spring Cleaning
PIN IT! 
My spring cleaning mini-lution is different from the normal spring cleaning you are thinking of. Although I did want to begin the new month with a clean house and clean laundry, my spring cleaning is a bit more symbolic and faith-based than the normal scrub down. Mine was solely mental and physical. What does that actually mean? It’s like a detox from bad energy, an erasing of negativity and bad habits, a new start to a brand new month. Still sound kind of vague? Well, I’ve explained day by day exactly how I “spring cleaned” my life.
Days 26-28: Embark on a 3 day ‘junk ‘ detox. I wanted to kick off my spring cleaning with an old-fashioned detox from junk food and alcohol. Let me preface this by saying I eat quite healthfully and am, BY NO MEANS, an alcoholic, But I’ve been feeling really tired, sluggish, bloated and overall unhealthy lately so I found no better way to begin a rejuvenation than to kick the bottle and the bag [of chips]. The first day was easier than expected, thanks to my ambitious and excited mindset. I ate fresh salads with an array of vegetables and fruits, whole wheat toasts and cereals and nothing artificial. I also gave up my glass of wine with dinner and replaced it with some good quality H2O. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted ice cream and wine, but I wanted to feel better more. The second and third day were a little tougher, the cake in the office for the March birthdays and the constant supply of candy near my desk were a constant temptation. So to avoid bingeing on laffy taffy’s and double chocolate cake I brought mini cheese wheels and celery sticks to curb my hunger. They didn’t taste as good, but they filled me up, which is more than I can say about those empty calories!
Days 29-31: Forgive myself. Like every other person on the planet, I’m not perfect and my life is a direct representation of that. I’m not saying I don’t like my life, I’m just saying there are holes and tears in it that show the highs and lows. I’ve made mistakes, some a lot worse than others, I’ve hurt people I love, many who I no longer have, and I’ve hurt myself [figuratively and emotionally] more times than I can count. And with me, these pieces of past have been following me around for ever. I’m 24 years old and I have the emotional baggage of someone twenty years older. It’s hard carrying around your mistakes and your broken heart, the weight gets almost too heavy to bear. So on days 29-31, I did some serious soul-searching and realized that I need to make peace with my past and forgive myself for all of the wrongs I’ve done.
This was the most emotionally trying few days I’ve had in a long time. It’s hard enough to think back on the low points in your life, but add in forgiving yourself for some of these lows, it’s a recipe for some serious breakdowns. Forgiving myself for hurting people I loved and for making mistakes in college were, by far, the hardest pieces of this puzzle. I walk around with so much guilt hanging over me. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think, even if just for a second, about how much I miss certain people or how I wish I’d handle things differently. In order to truly forgive myself, I had to let that go and make peace. It was hard. There were a lot of tears shed. But I managed to let myself be forgiven and I managed to let these pieces and memories go, no matter how painful that process was. Going forward, I need to learn that I’m not perfect, and that’s okay. I have to forgive myself and my past if I ever want to have a chance at a full and happy future.
Day 1: Replace I can’t with I can. After those really hard few days, I needed something that would lift my spirits. The best way to boost my mood is to eradicate all of the negative thoughts and ideas that frequent my mind and replace them with positive thoughts and messages. It seems really after school special and a bit self-help, but trust me, as cheesy as it is, it really puts you in a better mood and makes all of your goals more attainable. For example, I remember thinking I couldn’t actually hand make any of the gifts for our wedding gift bags. So instead of thinking I couldn’t and looking at places to buy these, I sat down and planned out how I could and a compromise with that. I’m not a great baker so i probably won’t make the cookies, but I can certainly make the little gift boxes with some help. A task that I was sure I wouldn’t be able to do became something that would be fun to do with the help of friends. You’ll be surprised at how much more exciting life becomes when you start realizing your own potential.
Day 2: De-clutter my mind. This picture sums it up so elegantly. I sometimes feel like I have so much going on in my mind that I need a professional cleaning crew [or wrecking crew] to hop in there and throw out unnecessary thoughts and desires. My mind is in a constant race against time and sometimes I feel so overwhelmed with all I have to do and the timeframe to do it all that I just get burnt out and get to feeling pretty defeated. De-cluttering my mind was not as easy as, say, de-cluttering my living room, but it was just as necessary. There’s no way I was going to accomplish any of my goals or get anything done with everything that was plaguing my mind. So I sat down and transferred all of the clutter from my head onto my computer. Once most of my dreams/ambitions were right in front of me, it was almost obvious which ones had to stay in the here and now and which ones needed to be put on hold. My mind still races and I still feel overwhelmed at times, but having a place to put all of these misguided thoughts frees up some space in my mind and keeps me sane [somewhat].
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Superfood of the Week [+ a recipe!]: Dark Chocolate
Yes, you read that right, chocolate is this week’s superfood! And no, I’m not delirious either. Chocolate is almost every woman’s “go-to” food after a breakup, bad day, good day, great sex, bad sex, work out, job layoff, promotion…[you get the picture]. No matter what mood you are in, a bite of chocolate releases an overwhelming feeling of comfort, relaxation and nostalgia. However, these feelings are not the only thing fantastic about our favorite dessert, this treat has real health benefits!
1. Lower blood pressure
According to research posted in a recent study, eating dark chocolate has the ability to decrease blood pressure and improve insulin sensitivity in healthy people. Insulin sensitivity is a major risk factor for diabetes and reduces the body’s ability to process glucose. The rich antioxidants found in dark chocolate have a healthy effect on blood vessels and can boost metabolism.
2. Flavonoids
Flavonoids are naturally occurring compounds found in plants and plant-based foods. They work to help protect plants by shielding them from environmental and man-made toxins, like pesticides and natural producing toxins. When we consume plant-based foods rich in flavonoids, like the dark cocoa bean, we also benefit from the antioxidants found in those plants. These antioxidants and flavonoids help our body’s cells resist damage caused by bacteria and free radicals that enter our body through environmental factors [smoke, smut] and through breathing. When we don’t get enough antioxidants, it allows our bodies to be more susceptible to free radicals and toxins, which can lead to us absorbing more LDL [bad cholesterol] and lead to more plaque in our arteries.
3. Cardiovascular benefits
The natural compounds found in cocoa and dark chocolate aid the cardiovascular system by improving blood flow throughout the body. Scientists have also discovered that cocoa may help maintain healthy arteries due to the treat’s ability to help your arteries relax, widen and maintain flexibility, which also works to aid in lowering blood pressure. Targeted studies on the effects of cocoa on the cardiovascular function explain that those who consume dark chocolate experience longer lives and less risk for heart disease. The antioxidants in dark chocolate also work to slow down the build up of LDL oxidation in our arteries, which leads to plague buildup and increases the risk of a heart attack.
So grab a Hershey’s dark bar or a glass of dark chocolate milk and relax knowing you are boosting your health with each bite and sip!
For a great way to enjoy dark chocolate without the bitterness, try this recipe below, courtesy of Eating Well!
Dark Fudgey Brownies
Ingredients
- 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
- 2/3 cup confectioners’ sugar
- 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder, American-style or Dutch-process
- 3 ounces semisweet or bittersweet chocolate (50-72% cacao), coarsely chopped, plus 2 1/2 ounces chopped into mini chip-size pieces, divided
- 1 1/2 tablespoons canola oil
- 1/4 cup granulated sugar
- 1 1/2 tablespoons light corn syrup, blended with 3 tablespoons lukewarm water
- 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
- 1/8 teaspoon salt
- 1 large egg
- 1/3 cup chopped toasted walnuts, (see Tip), optional
Preperation
- Position rack in center of oven; preheat to 350°F. Line an 8-inch-square baking pan with foil, letting it overhang on two opposing sides. Coat with cooking spray.
- Sift flour, confectioners’ sugar and cocoa together into a small bowl. Combine the 3 ounces coarsely chopped chocolate and oil in a heavy medium saucepan; place over the lowest heat, stirring, until just melted and smooth, being very careful the chocolate does not overheat.
- Remove from the heat and stir in granulated sugar, corn syrup mixture, vanilla and salt until the sugar dissolves. Vigorously stir in egg until smoothly incorporated. Gently stir in the dry ingredients.
- Fold in the walnuts (if using) and the remaining 2 1/2 ounces chopped chocolate just until well blended. Turn out the batter into the pan, spreading evenly.
- Bake the brownies until almost firm in the center and a toothpick inserted comes out with some moist batter clinging to it, 20 to 24 minutes. Let cool completely on a wire rack, about 2 1/2 hours.
- Using the overhanging foil as handles, carefully lift the brownie slab from the pan. Peel the foil from the bottom; set the slab right-side up on a cutting board. Using a large, sharp knife, trim off any dry edges. Mark and then cut the slab crosswise into fifths and lengthwise into fourths. Wipe the blade with a damp cloth between cuts.
Nutritional Information [per brownie]: 86 calories, 3 grams of fat and 2 grams of protein
Days 22-24: Work to break my bad habits
We all have bad habits. Those who say they don’t, well, they aren’t to be trusted. The word bad is quite subjective and obviously some bad habits are much worse than others [i.e. cocaine addictions are a bit harsher than, say, nail-biting]. But a bad habit is a bad habit, and no matter what your vice may be, your life will inexplicably get better and healthier if you cut out these habits and replace them with good ones.
My bad habits are on the less extreme side, but they are still not good for my mental or physical health. So my mini-lution for days 22-24 was to break some of my bad habits.
Bad Habit 1: Sleeping with my make up on
Sleeping in your make up is not going to kill you, per say, but it will kill your complexion! After a long day, your face is full of debris from the day [smoke, dirt, sweat] and make-up can trap these pesky elements in your skin. If you don’t wash your face or remove your make-up, your face becomes a breeding ground for bacteria, which leads to break outs, black heads and oily skin. If you forget to take it off [we all have, hello late nights with the girls!] don’t fret yet. Washing your face first thing in the morning can help to remove some of the built up bacteria caused by make up and the night.
Bad Habit 2: Binging on weekends
Now, I don’t nearly drink as much as I used to [thank god for growing up!], but I do tip the bottle more frequently on weekends than I do any other time during the week. The weekends, for many people my age, are the only “free nights” they have to go out and unwind from a stressful school/work week with a few drinks. Well, the word few is very subjective, and one person’s few may be two drinks while another’s few may be 7. Mine falls somewhere in the middle. Binging on anything is hazardous to your health, but binging on alcohol can be fatal, not to mention can lead to serious weight gain in your abdomen.
So, if you are like me, and don’t want to completely cut your ties with alcohol, stick to one or two drinks on the weekend and drink moderately throughout the week. A study published by the Harvard School of Public Health found that drinking moderately helps to regulate insulin in your body, could prevent your joints from rheumatoid arthritis, and those who drink report higher levels of physical and mental health than those who don’t! To feel better, have just one drink instead of three and you’ll see some real health benefits!
I am not saying that those who choose not to drink should for health benefits. This is merely for those who enjoy drinking. This is in no way advocating the use of alcohol, just providing some recent facts.
Bad Habit 3: Biting my nails
Nail biting is one of the most common habits around and doesn’t affect just one particular age group. People ranging from age 3-89 can be nail biters, male or female, black or white. I am a nail biter, tried and true. Nail biters are said to be stressed, nervous, hungry and anxious. [I certainly fit the mold of an over stressed, nervous wreck who’s always on a diet!] Not all nail biters have these commonalities, but most do wish they didn’t have this habit. Nail biting is not only an unsightly bad habit, it can be rather painful if you aren’t careful.
In the medical world, there is actually a name and tag for this irritating habit, it’s known as onychophagia, which affects nearly half of the teenagers in the world and more than 30% of children. Many doctors argue that children begin this habit early on because of their oral fixation growing up that comes from weaning them off bottles and pacifiers. Many also argue that teenagers, who are often very high-strung and going through hormonal changes, nail bite to help ease nerves. Either way, nail biting can be hazardous to children, as there has been a proven link between children who nail bite and those who suffer from lead posioning. So knock this habit out the door and run, work out, or chew gum to ease your anxious mind.
Bad Habit 4: Not eating breakfast
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day…so why is it so easy to skip? Even though I’m not skipping everyday like I used to, there are still some mornings when I run out the door with nothing more than a cup of coffee. And by lunch time, I am so ravenous I end up eating my lunch and then some, stuffing myself to uncomfort for the rest of the day. Not only does breakfast fill you up and prevent you from derailing your entire diet at lunch, breakfast also provides us with many other benefits.
Researchers have found that people who eat breakfast have a better chance of losing weight and keeping it off than those who do not. Studies have also proven that people who eat breakfast are more alert and do better on tests and work assignments than those who skip it. Eating breakfast works to improve memory loss and positively affects the way the brain absorbs and uses new information. Many breakfast foods, like whole wheat toast, eggs, yogurt and cereal are also very high in fiber, protein, calcium and vitamin D, which have mind and body boosting powers. So break your habit of skipping the morning meal for a slimmer waistline and healthier bones!
Bad habits don’t have to define you, so instead of giving into your impulsion to bite your nails, kick that nasty habit to the curb and replace it with a healthier habit, such as working out when your stressed or allowing yourself a few extra minutes in the morning for some toast. You’ll be shocked at how much better you feel [and look!]
Day 21: Learn the art of "give and take"
This picture sums it up better than I ever could. Love is all about compromise. Finding an equilibrium that works for both of you, not just one of you. For me, this has been the hardest part of love. I’m definitely a taker in relationships. I want it my way or no way at all. Granted, I will give myself some credit, I have grown up a lot. But there are times when Elliot and I are talking about our future and the only option I hear is mine. His ideas and solutions seem to just go in one ear and out the other. Sometimes, I just want to take without having to give back much of anything.
And let me tell you folks, that does not make a solid, good relationship. I’ve learned the hard way, through many tears and hour-long fights, that you can’t have a relationship without give and take. I’ve tried to find some sort of loophole, but I’ve come up empty-handed. So to avoid many unnecessary fights, and to really have a strong, healthy relationship, I had to master how to not only take, but also give. Below I listed the biggest ‘thing’ we’ve been arguing about and how it was fixed with a dash of compromise. [I’d add more, but really don’t feel the need to air all of my dirty laundry!]
Argument: To move or not to move, that is the question
Moving, by any definition, is never easy. It’s stressful, daunting, overwhelming, exhausting and monumental, which are emotions and adjectives that are never easy on a person, better yet two. So take the concept of moving [a 2 bedroom apartment and 2 dogs] and then add in the financial aspect [more rent for less space], and you’ve got yourself a nice little enviroment for an argument. I want to move for three, very solid, very logical reasons: 1. I hate the metro and want a shorter commute 2. I’m young, vibrant and careless and want to live in the city. 3. Our neighbors, I’m sure, know everything about us and will have us evicted if we don’t. So, I’ve pushed the idea of moving into the city onto Elliot and really haven’t given him any sort of opinion in the matter. I’ve found apartments and I’ve set up times to visit, without really consulting him.
It’s never good to be at each other’s throats [or in this case, each other’s backs!]
Well, let’s just say he didn’t like that much. One of our most recent fights is about how I haven’t even considered his feelings or his opinion in the matter. So this time, instead of just yelling at him and ignoring his side like I have in the past, I decided to listen, to see if maybe some of his points were legit. And you know what? They were. He wants to move for the same reasons as I, but with graduate school and a wedding, thinks it might not be the most financially responsible decision. He also doesn’t feel comfortable paying substantially more for substantially less. All points I agree with and should have listened to in the first place. So to appease us both, I’ve started looking in neighborhoods other than the ritzy, uber-pricey ones and have formulated a savings plan that will ease the cost of moving on him. If you do a bit of give and take, the outcome is always a win win. I get to move and he gets to remain fiscally afloat.
Now, I’m not saying all things can be solved with this method, but some of the most common arguments can be eased with a dash of compromise. [At least in my case!] So next time you are admist a fight, take a few minutes to hear out your partner. You might be surprised at how much you agree with them and how easy the issue can be resolved if you just a give a little.
Life’s so much easier when you are on the same team!
